Here we are, the lavish life in North Carolina ended and the student life starting again. Nine months ago I thought I would be the victim to more random and unintended adventures in such a strange and foreign land, but for myself I managed to stay in good, boring shape the whole time. Home, work, Harris Teeter, work, home, etc…
There were some unexpected things that happened in that time however. Such as about 6 months ago, this girl insisted on being my loving, devoted and epically-fantastic girlfriend. So that was a happy surprise. She is back in North Carolina being epically-fantastic in her own internship now, and I am here going to classes. Yay me. Yay us.
Life has a way of being randomly unexpected at times. People say things like that a lot. I see that it makes sense. What we call “life” in this context and all the things it consists of are “controlled” by a countless number of separate variables/people/things/events. There is no way at all we could predict it all. (Not until Skynet takes over that is…) Given this situation, the logical person adopts a philosophy of “Hakuna Matata” and moves on. This is what I have done for the last several years. Up until recently, this hasn’t been an issue for me really since all the random and unexpected things in my life were either trivial or really good/fortunate happenstances that I was able to gladly accept.
A while ago I was talking about a method of emotional self-protection I’ve observed which causes a delayed reaction to major changes. This major change is still in the process of reacting. The delay was assisted by the fact that I have had unfortunate amounts of shit to shovel and deal with (professionally, scholastically, domestically) in the few days since and it isn’t going to slow down soon. Some would say that is a good thing. Others would rather there be nothing to distract the mind and soul from dealing with the present. Honestly, I once thought I knew but I don’t know on which side of that argument I stand.
Here are some things I do know. I do know that if I were the kind to profess my undying love and infatuation for someone on a public medium this would be the time. (Whenever I see it, it just looks and sounds tacky and a little ridiculous. I guess I can understand it but still, some things are better left in private.) If I were in a movie with a low special effects budget and they were in for a close up of my face, there would be stars and little hearts and puffs of pink smoke in my eyes. If money and future stability were not an issue I would be in a different state right now. If the world were kind enough to work the way I wanted it to, I would not have to be in classes to get a diploma to get a job to get success and all the toothpaste I’d ever want. I could instead spend the rest of my life with the one who makes me happy and her willow tree.
But the world is not that perfect. Here we are in reality, and here I am with my next little chapter of existence. Here I am with my next obstacle on my sprint to success. Now jump.